Talking about sex: why is it so difficult?

Muhammad Usman Babar
4 min readOct 22, 2020


Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

There are myths, taboos, and various beliefs around sex that make it difficult to talk about it. However, communication regarding this is relevant and should not be overlooked. How to talk about sex?

Talking about sex is difficult, even though it is known to be present almost everywhere. In fact, it is not easy for many people to participate in these types of conversations, either because they feel embarrassed or because they find it confusing.

On the other hand, some do not know how to distinguish between what sexuality is or what differences exist between sex and gender. These, and many other doubts, continue to persist even though it is now relatively easier to have information about it.

Why is it so difficult to talk about sex?

Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash

In almost all spaces it becomes a difficult subject to approach. For example, some parents still do not explain to their children on the subject, until they ask. However, today it is known that it is important for parents to talk about these issues with their children since it is part of their education.

Likewise, some couples do not manage to talk about sex either, which complicates relationships, since neither gets to know what the other’s sexual tastes or preferences are. While it is difficult to address this issue, there will always be doubts, confusion, and little understanding of the other.

Sex and sexuality

Talking about sex is not the same as talking about sexuality, since there are differences between the two concepts. As long as the subject remains taboo, confusion will continue to reign. In any case, unresolved doubts prevent each person from knowing more about himself and having problems defining his personality.

Some institutions have already clarified that the term sexuality implies “a set of anatomical, psychological and affective conditions that characterize each sex.” That is, it is a fairly broad concept that encompasses the concept of sex, itself.

For this reason, referring to the issue of sexuality implies considering social, cultural, and any other determining factors in a person’s life. What there is no doubt is that this issue should be integrated into everyday life to clear up so many confusions that exist.

It is necessary to promote reflection on sexuality and destroy all myths about sex. This will allow us to put an end to any type of thinking that, instead of clarifying, subjects individuals to feeling guilt and fear.

How to talk about sex?

It has already been explained that talking about sex is not the same as talking about sexuality, because the latter concept is much broader. However, sexuality is the possibility of talking about sex. Thus, intimacy and pleasure can be expressed through certain beliefs, thoughts, attitudes, fantasies, norms, values, among others.

When talking about sex, it refers to the physiological and anatomical characteristics that make the female differs from the male, but that does not necessarily have to coincide with the way each person feels. For these reasons, it is a relevant issue in the family nucleus, schools, and, above all, in the couple.

Guidelines for talking about sex

· Assume that it is a vital issue: that is, that it is part of every human being.

· Recognize its importance: that is, the most illogical thing is to live without trying to talk about sex because it is part of one of the dimensions of life.

· Addressing the subject itself: trying to avoid the taboos that exist on the subject. The most important thing is clear and truthful information.

· Share with your partner: to be able to get to know each other better and recognize their tastes and desires. Talking about sex in the couple reinforces intimacy.

· Put shame aside: because whether you want to recognize it or not, sexuality is a dimension of life, and within this, it is relevant to address these issues.

Debunking myths about sex

It is advisable to put aside any feelings of shame when talking about sex, and this begins, especially, at home. It is time to put aside the taboos, myths, and false beliefs to approach the subject from the greatest possible objectivity to achieve a good sex education. Published By